Thursday, October 21, 2010

Stranded

     "Am I dreaming" "Is this really happening to me?"
I try to shake myself awake but  I realize I am awake and this is not a dream.  I feel like I am a part of  a History movie. I wish this was just a movie and that I'm sitting on the couch with a bowl of popcorn watching it. This is for real I really am on a raft in the middle of the ocean surrounded by nothing except water and whatever creatures lurk underneath me.

   My story begins when I was at the state fair. I went for a day to check it out and see what the new attractions were this year. I decided to look around in the building were the advertisers try to sell you cheesy junk that they make you think you need. I walked around a while and watched all the people who fell into the advertisers traps. I just laughed and kept walking. I roamed the building until I came across a stand that interested me. It was about Cruises. I talked to the lady at the stand for a while and then I entered myself in a drawing for a free 7day cruise in the Bahamas. I decide I was done at the fair so I grabbed a funnel cake and left.
 The following week was like every other week. I go to work in the morning and then come home and go to school. I'm taking some classes at night so I can hopefully get my bachelors degree soon. One night while I was on way home from school I got a phone call. I didn't recognize the number so I let it go to voice mail. When I got home I checked my phone and realized they had left a message. I listened to the message and couldn't believe what I heard. I had won a cruise in the Bahamas and I'm leaving tomorrow!! I quickly pack my suitcase with my swimsuits, shorts, tank tops, and of course flip flops. I'm so excited for my trip I have a hard time sleeping.

    When I arrive at the airport I find my flight and sit in the waiting area until I am told to board. I have a long flight but I finally land. When I land I retrieve my luggage and take a taxi to were I have to board the cruise ship. I board the ship and I'm immediately escorted to my room. My room is so fancy it even has a hot tub!!

 I immediately get my swimsuit on and head for the sky deck. I grab a lawnchair and find a place in the sun. I fall right to sleep. I must have been asleep for a long time and we must have traveled a long way because when I woke up to someone shaking me. They were screaming, "Wake up quick we have to get off the boat fast".

 I was extremely puzzled. I had no idea what was going on, until I stood up and realized water was gushing onto the boat. The boat was sinking!!! I followed the generous lady who had woken me up to were they were lowering people out of the boat and onto the yellow rafts. At this point in time I was scared to death. I mean, wouldn't you be? When I made my way to the front of the line and it was my turn to get on a raft, I was terrified. I had always been scared of the ocean and all the creatures in it, especially sharks. I told myself to be brave and I got on the raft. They lowered me into the water and off I went.

 Everybody on rafts were frantically trying to row and paddle towards shore. They honestly weren't going anywhere. I sat in my raft and watched them struggle. I must have been sitting for a while because the next thing I knew i was dreaming about being on a beautiful cruise. When I woke up I realized that i was alone there were no other rafts in sight. My heart stopped.

    I don't know how many days and nights I was stranded but it must have been at least a week.  I was so tired, hungry, and weak that I spent most of my time sleeping. One early morning when the sun was just rising I heard a boat's motor coming towards me.  I used the rest of my strength to wave my hands in the air and yell, "HELP".

   They luckily saw me and were kind enough to rescue me and bring me back to shore. After that I promised myself to never go on a cruise again.

2 comments:

  1. Great job! It is very obvious that you upgraded lots of words to stronger vocabulary, and I was able to hear your voice when I read this. The only errors I found was in the end, you forgot to capitalize some of your "I's". I really enjoyed reading this story.

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  2. I really liked the story but I was kind of confused when you came back to the present because you started out telling the story of how you got on the raft but you just kept going from there like you were still in past tense.I really liked the story though.

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